Yesterday was my mother's birthday. She didn't want gifts, just her children y su nene over for dinner. Sounds simple right? It should have been.
My Dad picked up chicken from some unknown place and my Mom cooked a bunch of sides. My new meds don't allow me to drink soda, so I couldn't drink anything and I wasn't hungry. She was immediately offended and proceeded to make comments under her breath for the rest of the dinner.
Every who knows me knows I am under dietary restrictions. If I don't know where it came from and what it's made of, I don't eat it. I don't make a big deal about it either. I stay quiet and eat what I can, when I can.
Time for dessert. There were two choices, a double chocolate cake and an apple pie. No chocolate, but the apple pie would be okay as long as I ate a small piece. I guess my piece wasn't so small to her. In front of everyone she says, "Oh, I see what you're eating, sweets. Obviously you have been eating SOMETHING over there". Her words were like a hot knife cutting through my wrist. Her ojos full of disappointment.
I am so hurt and saddened by her comments. I can't even look at myself in the mirror anymore. First mi esposo emotionally and verbally abuses me and mi madre finishes me off. There is only so much a person can take.
Why am I so hurt? Mi madre has always been thin her entire life. Even after having her babies. She was so happy that I was thin as well. Until I got really sick in 2007. After that she constantly makes comments about my weight. My sister-in-law is super thin, so at the table I looked like the elephant in the room.
I've finally snapped. I haven't eaten much of anything since Sunday. It makes it easy since I have zero dolares. I've lost interest in everything and everyone one.
Triste y sola,