I went out last night with a group of good friends. We had so much fun telling stories and talking about old times. What you don't know is that I almost didn't show up.
Earlier that day I had a stress free shopping day con mi madre. That is an accomplishment in itself. While I was out, my ex called. It's strange, sometimes I really want to talk to him, see him, hug and kiss all over him. Other times just hearing his voice makes me cry angry tears.
Guess how I responded... angry tears. Later on of course. I won't ever let him see or hear me cry again. Talking to him yesterday made me remember the day he left me. The cold words and the look on his face. I remembered how he told me he was moving in with his girlfriend J and was going to "fuck the shit" out of her that night. Those words will never leave my head.
His girlfriend J has always been in his life. She was supposedly his best friend during our entire marriage. I'm guessing best friends with benefits. It doesn't matter now. I'm free of both of them. Actually they belong together, he should have never married me in the first place.
I can be strong and say all these things now looking back on our relationship. I will admit that the sight of J annoys the hell out of me. Everything on la puta is fake. Who walks around with basically a fake head? (hair, eyes, eyelashes, wrong color of make-up, over done lips) Why do I let someone so awful and immoral bother me so much? So much so that I almost missed out on an amazing night out with friends. I guess I still have a little baggage to get rid of asap. Now where's that trash compactor??? ;)
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Today is the day before my birthday. I'm happy I'm still alive to celebrate another year. Last year at this time, I didn't think I would survive. I couldn't even spend my birthday comfortable in my own home. This year I am blessed to be at home surrounded by people who love and care about me. That's the best gift I could receive. The gift of peace and life.