Welcome to my world. Here you will find stories that will make you laugh, think, cry, and maybe not even believe. I'll share my love of technology, social media, Latino issues, relationship ups and downs, and my journey to good health.
Wednesday, December 25, 2013
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Back in the Day
My two favorite beverages were:
I think I spent all of my first paycheck on New York Seltzers. OMGosh. The strawberry, peach, and raspberry flavors were the best. I remember when we sold these at the movie theater I worked at during the summers. Those were good times. All the free popcorn and seltzers we could drink during a shift plus special movie screenings just for the staff and management. I have no idea why I was stressed back then. What was wrong with me?!?
Monday, December 16, 2013
Blog Adoration
Lisa Newlin - Seriously?
Please take the time to read her blog post on Spanx. Even if you've never tried on a pair (beotch) you will laugh.
Love, Teach
"Love, Teach" is a blog written by a young teacher. She is FABULOUS! I love her. She is my new spirit animal. The reason why I love her blog so much is that she actually is honest about teaching, her students, the people she works with and most importantly about herself. I am hooked.
The post I linked to explains why you should NOT date a teacher. Hahahahaha!!! *crying*
Besos,
Monica
Monday, December 9, 2013
Well, well, well.
-I have Pneumonia again. This is twice in two months. I refuse to go to the hospital again so I am doing home treatments. I pray this works. I cannot be sick for Christmas.
-Craigslist is no longer my guilty pleasure. The ads are getting super weird and not in a fun way. Plus there was another murder victim found this past weekend. A husband and wife who placed an ad for a threesome just to kill another person, to see what it felt like. Fortunately they were caught. *Update* An Iran War veteran was killed on December 9, 2013 meeting up with two teenaged boys supposedly selling an iPad. I'm staying far away from Craigslist. You should too.
-Grumpy is my new middle name. I think it's a combination of being constantly sick, working around idiots, and stress. Right now the only thing that makes me smile are the replays of "Modern Family" on the USA channel. The first two seasons of this show are comedy gold!!
-Barrow, Alaska is out. In my painstaking research I discovered the city doesn't allow bully breeds as pets. No pets?!?! BSL = BS. What kind of place is this? Ugh.
-My ex sent me a nonsense email with random pictures last night. He must have been high. I'm not even going to post it because it is a garbled mess. Just like him.
-I wish I could hire a nurse to come over to my house and give me postural drainage and percussion (PDP) treatments. I think my lungs would function a lot better.
-Just because I said it, doesn't mean that I meant it, even if you read it. My Adele-ish motto.
-Let people tell on themselves. Don't hate the player, hate the GAME!!! Lmao.
Muchos abrazos,
Monica
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
200!!!
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Thankful
-the experience of falling in love.
-God loving me and forgiving my sins.
Thursday, November 7, 2013
More Reflections
*I'm happy that my professional blog on the Common Core is doing so well. Every Child. Every Day. The Common Core.
*My ex is an evil man. I wish I never met him. I was stupid to have married him.
*Most of my stress comes from my lack of restful sleep at night.
*I wish I lived in Alaska right this minute.
*I am currently obsessed with the idea of relocating to Alaska.
*My daughter makes me smile.
*Mi sobrinito es un jefecito.
*Right now I have a huge bruise under my left eye and bruises all over my right arm. Rough night last night.
*Craigslist is a goldmine. Especially the personals. It's replaced World Star Hip Hop as my guilty pleasure. «No more CL after the recent murder in Pennsylvania. Scary!»
*I'm over Facebook. I will use it for Bliss by Monica posts from now on.
*Never let anyone blackmail you. Ever.
*I am not emotionally ready for the holidays yet.
*90% of my work clothes are from the INC brand at Macy's.
*Supporting a child at a private college in a big city is extremely expensive.
*I have tried my best to be the best Mom I can. I hope mi hija knows how much I love her.
*When I die, I want to be remembered as someone who was kind, intelligent, funny, a wonderful Mom, and a good Catholic.
*My dog Coda is part of the family. She's my hairy little companion. I'm taking her to Alaska and she will wear her coat and sweaters happily.
That is all,
Monica
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
Coward!

Monday, November 4, 2013
Friday, November 1, 2013
Make Me Over
*BareMinerals original foundation (golden deep) and concealer (honey bisque)
*Laura Mercier lipstick, lip liner, mascara
*Organix Renewing Moroccan Argan Oil shampoo and conditioner
*MAC Fluidline gel eyeliner
Monica
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Mentiras Perfectas
Never Settle!
He cheats on me.
He smokes weed all day.
He is an alcoholic.
He steals my money.
He stays out all night.
He can't keep a steady job.
He lies to me constantly.
But I got a man...
It's a shame what some women will live with and accept just to say they have a man.
~excerpt from "You Better Preach"
Never going back again,
Monica
Friday, October 25, 2013
RAWR!!!!
xxoo,
Monica
Monday, October 21, 2013
¿Estoy Mal?
Protect your heart. You only get one.
Always,
Monica
Sunday, October 20, 2013
Su Novia
Now you see why he loves her.
Monica
*Update-- She broke up with him. Turns out he was stalking her and being an idiot. Good for you bella.
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Esteem
Being chronically ill is exhausting. I don't have the strength to be happy. To top it all off my ex who just told me a month ago how much he wanted me back and was miserable, now has the perfect girlfriend. She is the exact opposite of me. She's gorgeous, thin, healthy, young, and everything anyone would want in a woman. I think my ex even loves her more than Natalie. All those sweet words about wanting me again were complete bullshit. I should have known, why would anyone want someone as worthless as me?
I'm going away for awhile. I'm turning off my phone and cutting off all social media. I will miss you all.
Take care,
Monica
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
Bad Things Come to an End
I enjoyed the drama, comedic moments, brutality, and most of all the Science involved throughout the entire series. If you haven't watched "Breaking Bad" you've been missing out on a fabulous show.
The series came to an end on September 29, 2013 with record breaking 10.3 million viewers! I highly recommend you check this show out.
Thursday, September 26, 2013
Strong
I also had to have blood gases taken. Blood gases is a procedure used to determine how much oxygen is in your body. A needle has to be jammed in your wrist at your pulse point. Still with me?? You have to remain completely still or the procedure has to be redone. So much pain :(. My blood oxygen level was 64%. Normal is 100%. I was definitely sick.
I've been through a lot in the last two weeks. Chemo treatment, paramedics twice, and too much money spent on copays. Many couldn't deal with half of the things I do and survive. I guess I am strong. Much stronger than I give myself credit.
Flexing,
Monica
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Miserable
Our teacher's union is useless and weak so I'm just going to have to suck it up and deal with this for the next 184 days. I never smile anymore. I don't speak to anyone at work unless I have to when I have hall duty in the morning. I've sent away for my disability retirement packet on Monday. I feel awful leaving my students, but for once I have to do what is right for me.
My plan is to relocate to Alaska. I want a nice small house that is big enough for my dog Coda and me. I also want a guest cabin if anyone wants to come out to visit. I have to have indoor plumbing, a fridge, running water, a fenced in backyard area, and city utilities. I'd love to live in Trapper Creek. Next fall I want to take a trip to Alaska to see how things really are up there. If I see it's not possible to relocate there, I'll move to someplace else cold and snowy.
I'm totally okay being alone. I don't have to disappoint anyone and no one can hurt me.
Counting the days until I am free,
Monica
Sunday, July 14, 2013
No Justice for Trayvon Martin
Disappointed,
Monica
Monday, July 8, 2013
Friday, June 28, 2013
Missing You
Triste,
Monica
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Getting Dirty!
Wednesday, June 12, 2013
Green Thumb
I recently bought a packet of flower seeds, Gaillardias to be exact. Gaillardia flowers are Native American flowers and are supposed to be a hardy perrenial. Just this week I saw several little sprouts where I planted the seeds. I was so excited. You would have thought I just won the lottery!! I'll be posting photos soon of all my hard work, including pictures of my Hostas, which are HUGE this year. Below is a photo of one of my Peonies. If you look closely you can see an ant on one of the leaves. So pretty and they smell amazing. Coda even sniffs them from time to time :).
Getting my hands dirty,
Monica
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
Today.
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Thursday, May 16, 2013
She Looks Like Me!

She looks like me!! Mierda. The lady in the ad that needs to lose belly fat looks just like me, fat tummy included. Draw a dream catcher tattoo on her shoulder and make her hair black and you've got me. Ay, who did this and donde esta mi dinero?!?
Laughing,
Monica
Tuesday, May 7, 2013
Happy Teacher Day!
Saturday, April 27, 2013
The Face of a Terrorist
The 19 year old man pictured below is a terrorist. He doesn't look like what I thought he would. Dzhokhar Tsarnaev is handsome. He's actually mi hija's "type" of guy physically. If she were dating him I would have met him and thought he was a good match, college student, personable... You never really know someone can you? #sicksadworld
Disheartened,
Monica
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Pray for Boston
My heart is saddened for all of the victims, families, and friends hurt in the explosion at the Boston Marathon on April 15, 2013. Please pray for Boston.
God Bless,
Monica
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Thursday, April 11, 2013
"You"
If I ever marry again, I want to dance to this song at the reception.
From this day forth,
Monica
Scared
If anything happens to me read through my blog posts and you'll know who is responsible.
The police will only help after the crime is committed. This updated Facebook profile picture tells me where his mind is at now.
Of course I'm scared, but I won't live in fear.
Everything happens for a reason,
Monica
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Prayer
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Started from the Bottom
There are so many reasons I love this video. I'd also like to be dressed in black at the party Drake's throwing.
Who is Drake's friend with the dark hair and beautiful eyes @1:42? Mmm.
Impressed,
Monica
Monday, April 1, 2013
Heartless
What the fuck is wrong with me? Why did I throw so much of my hard earned money away for a stupid ass son of a bitch? You've read my blog posts. Ten years of putting up with bullshit. Ten years of tears, lies, and drugs. EVERYONE told me to run. I was in love with the idea of love. When you marry someone the relationship should be 50/50, not 95/5.
Don't get the shit twisted, I love you, but I will not be your ride or die chick ever again. You've got a new chick. Good luck with that bitch. You two deserve each other.
Don't even think of doing anything to get back at me. I know everything. Everything. You haven't seen crazy if you mess with my family or me again. That Monica is dead.
Heartless,
Monica
Sunday, March 31, 2013
The List
After that job and the SUV fell apart, I co-signed for a new car and again helped out with your payments. Another job loss happened so I paid most of the car payments again.
Finally you were able to get your old job back again and things were going well. you convinced me to help you buy a 4-wheeler so you could stay home more often. That did not happen. You were gone more.
I was sad at home all the time. Now you needed a truck to haul your 4-wheeler. Another co-sign and more money out of my pocket. You were the winner in our relationship. I bought you anything you wanted. I let you do whatever you wanted.
I only wanted one thing from you and you couldn't even do that. Now you've found someone else. A country girl who is everything I'm not. That's what your personal ad asked for. I'm sure she'll make you happy. You two can sit around and get high and compare criminal stories, good for you. You never did anything for me other than pretend to care about me when I was sick. I was a burden to you. That was clear.
Don't worry about defending me or trying to help me. I can get the $ from Alex someway. I'm used to guys trying to take advantage of my kindness. I had 10 years of practice. I won't be erasing this blog. The truth will set us free.
Just,
Monica Lynn (Sorry I couldn't be Natalie Alice)
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Done.
I'm letting go. No more thinking about what could have been or could be. I'm so tired of being emotionally attached to you. No more tears. No more sad phone calls or text messages. Time to move on for real this time. I'm fine alone.
Tired,
Monica
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
The Evil Eight
- Arrogant entitlement
- Lack empathy
- No remorse/guilt
- Irresponsible/self-destructive
- Thrive on drama
- Brag about outsmarting
- Short-term relationships
- Fantasy world/delusional
Aware,
Monica
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Day in the Life of a Teacher
7:15 am arrive at work early to have access to copy room/grade papers in peace/clean room
8:00 am school bell rings
8:05 am parent emails start coming in (No I haven’t graded all the quizzes yet. I have 517 students.)
8:10 am planning period –40 minutes
-grade papers/answer emails/update lesson plans/conference with parents
-meet with administrators/read through IEPs and 504 Plans
8:50 am math class (co-teach with intervention specialist)
-each student in the class has a learning or behavior issue or both
9:50 am try to use restroom. Attempt #1. All full. Race back to classroom.
9:53 am class
10:38 am brunch aka lunch time
-meet with students who are struggling in class
-return parent phone calls
-shove food down throat
-restroom. Attempt #2. Line too long.
11:05 am class
11:50 am restroom. Attempt #3. SUCCESS!!
11:53 am class
12:36 pm class
-inclusion/3 adult aides in room
-every hand is usually up/not possible to meet the needs of all 28 students consistently
-frustrated :(
1:21 pm class
2:06 pm intervention/enrichment duty
3:00 pm bell rings
3:05 pm grade more papers/read through professional development powerpoint from state
-make good news or bad news calls home
-staff meeting
4:00 pm run to grocery store
4:30 pm cook small quick dinner/grade papers/read through personal emails
5:00 pm walk or play with dog/return personal calls/check social media
6:00 pm begin work for Bliss
-check Pinterest inspiration boards
-update website
-call clients
-participate in Twitter party to stay current in the field
7:00 pm watch a little tv and fall asleep
*This is what a day in my life looks like. I hope you all see why I’m grumpy sometimes ;).
I get upset when people say that teachers don't do anything all day. I bet most of you can go to the restroom whenever you want. Right? I bet you also have more than 27 minutes for lunch too.
Teaching is a year round position. Most of us take classes all summer, teach or tutor students, or work full time at another job. We're not lying on a beach reading trashy novels for three months straight.
I became a teacher because of the students. Even though we are disrespected and looked down on, I wouldn't want to be anything else. Nothing makes me smile more than when a student runs up to me and says I can't wait to come to your class later. That little face makes my day.
Exhausted,
Monica
Friday, March 8, 2013
A Little More about Me...
Product 19 cereal. Omgosh. My Dad used to eat this cereal when I was a little girl. One day I googled iron rich cereals and Product 19 came up. It has 100% of your daily iron. I've been eating it everyday for the past 2 weeks and I feel so much better. I knew I was severely anemic, but I didn't realize it was making me so grouchy and utterly exhausted. I will be buying iron rich cereals forever.
My boss still hates me, but I no longer care. I found out she hates almost everyone. What an unhappy miserable person she is. Ugh. I'm there for my students. I just close my door and do what's best for their benefit.
I gave up Facebook for Lent. Best decision ever! I don't miss the phony updates, drama, or annoying people. I do miss looking at most of the baby pictures some of my friends posted, but I'll be just fine. I also wasted so much time mindlessly staring at peoples pages. Maybe I'll go back when Lent is over, maybe I won't. Right now I'm enjoying the break. *By the way, M.E. you are so insecure and pitiful. Begging D to change his default picture back to one of the two of you was hilarious. You're such a sad girl.*
Last night I accidently sent a pic to the wrong number in my address book. I sent an innocent photo to Mike G instead of Mike P. Mike G kept texting me for the next hour about sending him naughty pics, even though I don't and won't do that sort of thing. It made me smile a little to know he was interested. Flattery will always get you points with me.
It feels great to be happy and healthy for a change!
Feeling pretty,
Monica
Saturday, February 16, 2013
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Friday, February 8, 2013
Women AND Men...
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.
3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.
4] The number one place women are abducted from/attacked at is grocery store parking lots.
5] Number two is office parking lots or garages.
6] Number three are public restrooms.
7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.
8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.
10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.
POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:
1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.
2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.
5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.
6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.
7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.
FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ….
1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.
2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!
3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.
4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping,eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side,put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.
5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:
a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB) .
b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (better paranoid than dead.)
6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).
7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!
8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.
Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.
*If you have compassion please reblog this post.
THIS COULD ACTUALLY SAVE A LIFE.
SOURCE: http://goo.gl/uzydR
Aware,
Monica
Monday, February 4, 2013
Fly Like an Eagle!
After the eagle flew away, I ran to my computer to research white eagles. There is not a lot of information other than people who dream about white eagles. I was discouraged until I began searching on the Native American sites I enjoy. I came across this paragraph:
If an individual has been going through a hard time, eagle not only signals a new beginning, but provides that person with the stamina and resilience to endure the difficulties. If eagle has appeared, it bestows freedom and courage to look ahead. The eagle is symbolic of the importance of honesty and truthful principles. Summon the eagle when you are about to embark on a challenge, a massive life change or a creative endeavor. Pure Spirit
Most of my regular readers know my life has been quite difficult for awhile now. I've been close to giving up and running away. Lately things have gotten better. I have hope for the future. The white eagle sighting confirmed it. God works in mysterious ways.
Blessed,
Monica
Saturday, February 2, 2013
Thank You.
Happy,
Monica
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Wedding Wednesday Update
Abrazos,
Monica
Sunday, January 20, 2013
New Standards
-Employed. No ifs, ands, or buts anymore. Full time year round employment.
-Less than five recent felonies. (babysteps)
-His best friend may not be his ex-wife/girlfriend. This is a hardline.
-No drugs of any kind. Weed is a drug.
-He must not be related to, nor former or current friend of, my ex husband.
You may say to yourself, "These qualifications shouldn't even need to be considered'. If you thought something like this, welcome to my blog new reader. I have terrible taste in men. My relationships have all been horrible failures. I'm starting fresh in 2013. Please call me out if I slip back into my old ways.
Besos,
Monica